Not long until speculation will be over

Just as the weather has been pretty calm and predictable in these parts lately, all news Canary appears to have been the same - well, fairly predictable if not that calm on some fronts.

Just as the weather has been pretty calm and predictable in these parts lately, all news Canary appears to have been the same - well, fairly predictable if not that calm on some fronts.

Still the same old 'x club has offered y millions for Dean Ashton and the City board are considering it…' stuff, to the 'City interested in z player of a club, intending to spend the millions generated by the sale of Dean Ashton to x club for y millions…', and so on. You know the scenario well by now I'm sure. (Can you tell I'm a mathematician?)

The fact is we are now 21 days into this month and there are only 10 or less to go then this whole thing can be put to bed, at least for now.

The only other slight change in atmospheric pressure this week has been caused by the gentle arrival of Carl Robinson who morphed from a Black Cat into a fully fledged feathered friend (try saying that when you've had a few), which was not altogether of a surprise if you listened to the grapevine before any recent games. Mind you that's the same grapevine that had us buying Rob Earnshaw and Robbie Fowler in recent weeks, so a pinch of Delia's well-seasoned salt is sometimes called for before digesting.

And so on to more matters financial in the form of the recently announced season ticket prices. If my memory serves me right then providing I purchase my ticket before mid-March I will actually be buying my seat for next season at £6 less than my current ticket cost. Result!

That I reckon would give me leeway to buy two programmes or three pies, a Canary Chick thong, six bottles of water or the same number of Golden Goal tickets, or maybe even Dean Ashton's little toenail (at a pinch) or a patch from Andy Hughes' face mask. Better get my beady eyes ready to look over my latest bank statement then and see if March is a goer before all those endless possibilities wear me out.

With the weather forecast predicting a return to colder temperatures I'm off to raid the airing cupboard for the thermals I hoped I'd packed away for the next 10 months and to see if I can find a tea towel for my head.

Watch out Nigel Worthington 'cos if anyone's going to find out if you have ambitions to give up your job and manage a Premiership team one day soon it's going to be undercover Susie, the 'counterfeit git' - the Pink 'Un's equivalent of the 'fake sheik' who knobbled Sven.