Shackell takes to The Hills

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A famous blonde, a Hollywood nightclub, a TV audience of millions, and a Norwich City footballer.

If that doesn't get your attention then nothing will…

The Man can reveal that our very own Jason Shackell made a cameo appearance in hit American TV series The Hills, and seemingly snogged its star lady.

The reality TV show - aired on MTV around the world - is watched by millions and stars Lauren Conrad, a rich kid trying to make it in the fashion industry.

The show follows Lauren and her friends around as they buy clothes, bitch about each other, get their hair cut, and go to nightclubs.

They are delicious, if you can ignore their obvious stupidity (which is not a tough ask if you have a pulse and even a hint of testosterone in your veins).

So, in such rarefied company, imagine the Man's surprise to see Shackell appear in one of the episodes - and apparently cop off with Lauren!

Former captain Shack pops up as the cameras follow Lauren and her friends to the Les Deux nightclub in Los Angeles; Mercy VIP it isn't.

I'm assuming it was filmed last summer, but it might even have been the summer before.

Eagle-eyed viewers might even spot the enigmatic Louis-Jean in the background, although I'm not sure.

Having now watched the episodes (1&2 of series three) more times than I care to admit, the show's dialogue went as follows:

In Les Deux nightclub…

Lauren: “Girls, girls! This is Jason - he has an accent!”

Shack: “I feel intimidated, you are a very good-looking girl.”

Lauren: “You come and sit with me. Come here. Come on Jason. (turns to her friends) He's so cute right?”

Shack: “I can't believe I'm leaving tomorrow - I'm absolutely devastated.”

Lauren: “You are leaving tomorrow?!! Audrina [her friend] I just found…an adorable boy…from London [technically Hertfordshire]…with an accent…who is leaving tomorrow. Jackpot!”

Later on in the Les Deux…the riveting conversation continues.

Shack: “Is that a sidekick?”

Lauren: “No, it's my Blackberry.”

Shack: “You Americans, you are always emailing.”

Lauren: “Americans? Am I American?”

Shack: “I like to hope so.”

Lauren: “Whitney! [another friend] Come here. I met a cute guy, come here. Tell me if you think he's cute because I'm drunk.”

Whitney: (After looking at Shack) No.

Next episode…the morning after…

Audrina: “You made out with that guy from London!”

Lauren: “Oh God.”

Audrina: “You guys kissed a lot.”

Lauren: “No we didn't”

Audrina: “It wasn't just once!”

Lauren: “Really! (Lauren laughs)”

IT IS a continual torment to the Man that he has to write this column before a game, for it to be published after a game.

Because, as we all know, 90 minutes is a long time in football.

Long enough to age a supporter by several years in fact...

Today's fixture against QPR was so important that come 4.45pm, we could have either completed the survival miracle, or be staring down the barrel of relegation.

And amidst such great turmoil we also have the very real prospect of one of our greatest ever (that expression now gives me the willies) players making his final Carrow Road appearance in a Norwich shirt.

Again, we don't know 100 per cent that Hucks is leaving, but all the indications are that he is off.

So forgive me if you are reading this in the midst of despair (if we lost to QPR), but whatever the circumstances, the Man simply could not let Hucks' last Carrow Road bow go undocumented on this page.

It is difficult to fully sum up what Darren Huckerby means to most right-minded Norwich fans, but the Man will try.

He arrived at a time when - in the most extreme cases - we were resorting to playing Ryan Jarvis and Ian Henderson up front.

In that context, to say he was a breath of fresh air, is something of an understatement.

He was an absolute revelation. A liberation from the tedium which we had come to accept.

And Norwich City doesn't sign players like Darren Huckerby. We get them at the start, or end of their careers, but not in their fruitful prime.

For every Hucks there has been 101 Dean Ashtons who have jumped ship at the first opportunity.

Hucks not only led us to glory, but he has stuck with us in the hard times too.

It was an absolute joy that a proper player was prepared to stand by this club, whose supporters were raised on seeing its best players leave.

The Man is not afraid to admit that he comes over a little peculiar when he thinks of Norwich City without Darren Huckerby.

Life will just seem a little greyer, the prospect of a little spark of magic to turn a game will gone.

There are too many Hucks' memories to document, but when I think about him I always

come back to that Cardiff game - while he was still on loan - when he just roared past their defence and slotted it calmly into the corner of the net.

Sensational: thousands of Norwich fans fell in love with him that day, in the truly platonic sense you understand…

He went on to lead us to promotion in a season that was worth the decade it took to wait for it.

If this season ends in relegation, it will be the least fitting end to Huckerby's career with us.

He does not deserve it.

This week Hucks said he knew from his second game on loan here that Norwich was “his club”. The feeling is mutual.

I'm sure that in years to come the “Oh Huckerby” chant will ring around Carrow Road in the same way “Oh ah Cantona” still does at Old Trafford.

Whatever happens next, the Man thanks Darren Huckerby from the bottom of his heart.

A special player, and a genuine supporters' hero.

You have made this corner of England very happy over the past five years, and that will never be forgotten.

OTBC.

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